The Struggle
Manifested
- by Gopikrishnan P. *
Well, the day is approaching when
I am going to sit back and say, "Here comes the day you were looking for..."
Friends, I am talking about the day when I am going to join IIMB as a PGSM
student. To take you back through those days when I literally was struggling to
establish my superiority over my inhibitions is not precisely why I am writing
this. It's just to make you aware of the roadblocks I faced and to make you
motivated for the cause.
The dream of doing an MBA degree
from a prestigious institute stemmed in my mind two years back. Being one among
lakhs of Indians who cherish the same dream, I too started my journey by
strengthening my basics and never missing any articles, which used to come in
any sites, including . They used to be my sources of motivation. I
was working by then, thereby handling both my work and studies simultaneously.
It was really a tough job, as any software professional would agree. We were two
of us, traveling in the same path, trying to keep ourselves focused on our
goals. To his fortune, he got through TAPMI in the first year, leaving me behind
with unfulfilled dreams to spar with.
I was guided by misconceptions,
which really proved very costly. I would have got through in TAPMI, had I
applied. Nevertheless my journey continued and my confidence was drooping down
like mercury reading going down in a thermometer. I started asking myself if I
was fit for this task. Though I had reasons to be complacent, I found that my
pride itself was at stake!!!
The CAT next year didn't fetch me
any better results apart from a marginal increase in the percentile. I decided
to move on. I never wanted to leave it in between, as I was too egoistic to do
so. I felt that if I did leave it, how would I justify whatever I had done for
the past two years? My friends started to think that this whole CAT episode of
mine was a hoax. I never had time for them any more. I was termed the rebel, who
never participated in any social gathering, as I never had time. I can't say I
was confident enough to correct them, but I had in my mind that I will get
through somehow.
CAT next year fetched me a much
better percentile. My score was neither bad nor too good to get me an IIM
full-time call. But by that time, I was old!!! I turned my attention to the PGSM
course conducted by IIMB, which I thought could be an ideal choice for me.
And friends, I could not describe
how I felt when I came to know that I got admission. It was an altogether
different feeling. People who mocked me seeing my preparations, turned towards
me for advice. How better my ego could get satisfied? When I sit here,
recollecting my journey till date, the road ahead looks dark and troublesome.
But I am trusting my ego, which has infact guided me till here. Is it a mission
triggered by my inhibitions and complexes, or is it a catalyst of my vision? I
am too excited now to reach a solution.
